How The Sun Shining On The World

Heat of the day had really touched my heart. How could I not, after a long and tiring journey ended there as the Customer Service with a smile said, "Sorry ma'am, the catalog for the next month out of stock...". What? And she added, "You want to take a bonus prize for sales, don't you? Sorry ma'am, in our system there is no gift on your account. Please see our officer ... blah ... blah .. blah ..." What the? Huaaah .... somehow I was not mad at that time to her! Though I would give bonuses to my husband, as his gratitude allowed me to try  small business. And new catalogs did not exist? Then should I sell fried foods?

Spontaneously, I immediately took out my son's hand, stopped public transportation and went away though I go home empty handed!

Arriving at the bus stop, so hurry up, until the little one was almost giddy following my footsteps, fearing to miss the trans metro bus . Alhamdulillah, we  got a seat that everyone would jostle. I remembered when the bus was full and we were not able to sit, a young man sitting with no sense of shame and pity to let us just oscillate when a bus often brake suddenly, sometimes even a little one stumbled the pole. Really, where is the moral and ethical of young people nowadays? Was not often in school lessons written in a note: "To provide seating for the elderly or pregnant women when on the bus."?

Inside the bus, the little one who has followed her mother since the morning tired, fell asleep in my arms. I was confused. How can I hold my baby in his deep sleeping and also carrying luggage?

Arriving at the crossroads, with all my energy and flood sweat, I carried my son in one hand and  carried items in another, off the bus at the bus stop. I had to walked again to the base motorcycle taxis. Oh My God, the heat was so hot and my load was really weight. Little Bee was 11 kgs. Please imagine .... ^ _ ^

During that tiring journey, I admire how hard being a mother but also how wonderful being a mother.

Let me through all of it as a story for him in the future, so he knows I love him so much.

And let he knew, his mother gave up everything for him, for make him happy.

Tiredness and fatigue was nothing for me, as I do for him.

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At the same time, it was no pain in my heart anymore when I stopped working. At the time I was told a week before the contract expires that the employment contract was not renewed. When I should still in mourning the death of your grandfather that even not 40 days, which just visited by two employees of the office of 50 people who worked there. At the time I had overtime Saturday and Sunday without holiday for almost 3 months, without being able to spend time with you, just for the sake of pursuing deadline of the stacking data due to that stupid sluggish system. At the time I even admonished by your father because of it. At the time I got sick due to exhausted, and when only two days of illness, doctor's note was required already, which even the greeting "May get-well" was not said! Even when I was old pregnant, carried you, still wanted seek and reported my fault. Even at few days after giving birth, just visited by office security that is so I appreciated, from almost 50 people there. Oh yes, have I told you that when you were 3 months old, I brought you to the office for jobs that are worthless now?

All of it was no pain anymore, my son. Because of you.

Because I know, my struggle and sacrifice will not be in vain like that with raising and caring you until my body was destroyed. Because I know, my love is more more valuable than the monthly salary that I could even get rid of my self-worth and keep me away from you.

Because I know, I love you unconditionally. How the Sun shining on the world.

Original version in Indonesian Language as I posted in my Note Facebook:

Bagai Sang Surya Menyinari Dunia

Terik di siang hari tadi benar-benar menyentuh hatiku. Bagaimana tidak, setelah perjalanan panjang dan melelahkan berakhir begitu saja saat si Customer Service dengan penuh senyum berkata, "Maaf mbak, katalog untuk bulan depan habis...". What??? Dan ditambah lagi, "Mbak mau ambil bonus hadiah (penjualan) ya? Maaf mbak, disystem tidak ada hadiah atas nama account mbak. Silahkan mbak menemui...bla...bla..bla..." What the??? Huaaah....entah kenapa saat itu aku tidak marah! Padahal bonus itu akan kuberikan kepada suamiku, sebagai rasa terima kasih mengijinkan aku berusaha kecil-kecilan. Dan katalog baru tidak ada? Lalu aku jualan gorengan sajakah?

Spontan saja, aku segera keluar menggandeng tangan putraku, menyetop angkot dan pergi dari situ walaupun aku pulang dengan tangan kosong!

Sesampainya di halte, begitu buru-buru, hingga si kecil hampir limbung mengikuti langkahku, karena takut ketinggalan bus trans metro. Alhamdulillah, kami mendapatkan tempat duduk yang biasanya semua orang akan berdesakan. Aku teringat ketika bus sungguh penuh dan kami berdua tidak bisa duduk, seorang lelaki muda duduk dengan tanpa rasa malu dan kasihan membiarkan kami begitu saja terombang-ambing bus yang suka rem mendadak, bahkan terkadang si kecil sampai terantuk tiang. Sungguh, moral dan etika generasi muda dibawahku kini entah ada dimana. Bukannya sering di sekolah pelajaran PMP atau PKN atau Budi Pekerti dulu namanya, tertulis di catatan: "Memberikan tempat duduk untuk orang tua atau ibu hamil ketika di bus."

Di dalam bus, si kecil yang sudah lelah mengikuti ibunya sejak pagi, akhirnya tertidur dipangkuanku. Aku pun bingung. Bagaimana caranya menggendongnya yang tengah lelap tertidur dan membawa barang bawaan?

Setiba di persimpangan, dengan segenap tenaga dan peluh yang membanjiri, kugendong anakku ditangan satu dan tangan yang lain membawa barang turun di halte. Aku harus berjalan kaki lagi sampai di pangkalan ojek. Ya Tuhan, panas begitu teriknya dan bawaanku bukan main beratnya. Si kecil sekarang sudah 11 kg. Silahkan membayangkannya.... ^_^

Di saat perjalanan itulah, aku mengagumi betapa susah menjadi seorang ibu tapi betapa indahnya pula menjadi ibu.

Biarlah semua itu kujalani sebagai cerita untuknya di masa depan, agar ia tahu aku begitu mencintainya.

Dan agar ia tahu, ibunya menyerahkan segalanya, agar ia bahagia.

Lelah dan penat tidak begitu terasa, karena kulakukan untuknya.

Seiring itu, rasanya pun tidak begitu sakit lagi disaat Bunda berhenti bekerja. Di saat Bunda diberitahukan seminggu sebelum kontrak berakhir bahwa kontrak kerja tidak diperpanjang. Di saat seharusnya Bunda masih dalam berkabung kematian kakekmu yang bahkan belum genap 40 hari, yang dilayat oleh dua orang karyawan kantor dari hampir 50 orang yang bekerja disana. Di saat Bunda telah lembur Sabtu Minggu tanpa libur selama hampir 3 bulan lamanya, tanpa bisa menghabiskan waktu denganmu, hanya demi mengejar membereskan data-data menumpuk dikarenakan system tolol yang begitu lambannya. Di saat Bunda bahkan dimarahi oleh ayahmu karena itu. Di saat Bunda jatuh sakit karena kelelahan, dan ketika baru dua hari sakit, sudah dimintakan surat dokter, yang bahkan ucapan "Semoga lekas sembuh" pun tidak terucap. Yang bahkan di saat Bunda hamil besar, mengandungmu, pun masih dicari-cari kesalahannya untuk bisa dilaporkan. Yang bahkan di saat setelah melahirkan pun, cukup dijenguk si bapak security kantor yang sangat begitu Bunda hargai, dari hampir 50 orang tadi. Oh ya, sudahkah Bunda cerita bahwa saat umurmu 3 bulan, Bunda membawamu ke kantor demi pekerjaan-pekerjaan yang saat ini sudah tak berarti lagi?

Semua itu rasanya tidak begitu sakit lagi, nak. Karenamu.

Karena Bunda tahu, perjuangan dan pengorbanan Bunda tak akan sia-sia seperti itu dengan membesarkan dan merawatmu hingga tubuh Bunda ini luluh lantak. Karena Bunda tahu, kasih sayang Bunda jauh lebih berharga daripada gaji bulanan Bunda yang bahkan bisa menyingkirkan harga diri Bunda dan menjauhkan Bunda darimu.

Karena Bunda tahu, cinta Bunda padamu tanpa syarat. Bagai Sang Surya menyinari dunia.